This was a week of extremes. My body was just not having it. I stayed home from work one day. That night I watched the girls learn whips from the sidelines. This was a big deal for me as I hadn't missed a practice yet and whips are the derby's meow. Maybe I don't always have the energy for practice, but it often arrives when I get there. That night, my gear sat dull and dry in my trunk.

Sitting on the bench I studied posture and feet. The day before I'd seen footage of myself in action for the first time. The contrast between me and the other girls was obvious. It reminded me of elementary school, when we learned that buildings with more give survive earthquakes with less damage. I had to get low.

Later on, at my computer, I came across a posting from Look Like a Rockstar, Skate Like a Roller Girl titled, "Playing Hurt". (http://rollerderbyworkouts.blogspot.com/2010/08/playing-hurt.html) The author wrote:

"If you are injured, something is torn or broken, you should take all of the necessary precautions to allow yourself to heal. If your hurt, in some sort of pain or discomfort, I would recommend that you push through the best you can."

Being out of commission aside, I had gotten lazy with recent practices. Early on there was one night in particular where I couldn't quite distinguish between tears and sweat. I don't think I'd ever felt that before. It was awesome. As was the next practice.

Maybe it was the extra rest I'd gotten, but I think last night I felt what the experienced skaters have been calling the "click". Don't get me wrong, I've got a long way to go, but last night certain things required less thought. Energy was expelled more efficiently. Falling didn't feel like an event.

Even though things have gotten better than they were, I have new confidence that they will soon be better than they are. The rink can't come soon enough.